


Recongising a Mistake

by Diary



Category: Different for Girls (1996), London Spy, Sherlock (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Different for Girls (1996) Fusion, Alternate Universe - Sherlock (TV) Fusion, Background Relationships, Bechdel Test Fail, Canon Gay Character, Canon Gay Relationship, Conversations, Established Danny Holt/Alex Turner, Established Relationship, F/M, Late Night Conversations, Love, M/M, Male Friendship, Minor Kim Foyle/Paul Prentice, Multiple Crossovers, POV Danny Holt, POV Male Character, POV Queer Character, Romance, Season/Series 01
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-27
Updated: 2016-03-27
Packaged: 2018-05-29 10:25:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,244
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6371155
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Diary/pseuds/Diary
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Crossover. Danny ends up in a pub and meets Paul Prentice. They talk about soulmates and their respective relationships. Complete.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Recongising a Mistake

**Author's Note:**

> I do not own any of the fandoms contained within.

Danny ends up at a small pub, orders a pack of crisps with a cup of tea, sits in a booth, and listens to some football match on TV.

An older man walks by, almost trips over a slope in the floor, and curses when his own pack of crisps lands on the floor.

Getting up, Danny helps him clean up.

“Thanks, mate,” the man says. “Hope whoever put that look on your face is worth it.”

“I’m fine,” Danny tells him. “If you’d like, I can share mine with you.”

The man checks his wallet and sighs. “Don’t offer if you don’t mean that. I haven’t got any more money on me.”

“I mean it."

“Cheers, mate,” the man says. Slipping into the booth, he offers his hand. “Paul Prentice.”

Shaking it, he says, “Danny Holt."

“If it’s not my business, just tell me, but when I was younger, there were loads of times I was fine. If you’d asked me, I would have told you that I was always fine. Of course, it usually wasn’t some girl who was the cause until I met my wife again. Is she or he worth it?”

Danny sighs. “He is.”

“Want to talk about it?”

“Not really,” Danny honestly answers.

“Fair enough."

“Are you having problems with your wife?”

Grinning, Paul shakes his head. “Ah, no. She’s on a business trip, and like always, I’m fending for myself until she gets back. Sometimes, I wonder how I survived the sixteen, seventeen years without her.”

“How long have you known her?”

A soft smile takes over Paul's face. “Almost forty years. Well, sort of. We were best mates in school, lost contact, and then, like I said, about seventeen years later, we met up again.”

“Did you always know you loved her?”

“Not in the way you’re asking,” Paul answers. “See, back in school, Kim was called Karl, and she didn’t have anywhere near the beautiful body she does now. Of course, I loved my mate. Took more than one beating trying to teach our prick classmates a lesson. But she needed time to fully become and get used to being Kim, and when we first met up again, I still needed some time to come to terms with- well, everything really.”

Nodding, Danny smiles. “Beautiful story.”

“Yeah,” Paul agrees. “It is.”

They eat quietly.

“I like to say I’m not ashamed of my past,” Danny says. “And most of the time, it’s true. But then, I met Alex, and just when I thought everything was so great- It’s a complicated story.”

“I’ve got nothing but time,” Paul replies.

Settling more comfortably in the booth, Danny says, “The short version is: I’ve done a lot of different things with a lot of different men. One of them- he’s one of my few actual regrets. Earlier, one of Alex’s bosses came over to his flat, and how much he looked like the guy- it was disturbing. It brought up a lot of memories and doubts.”

“Right, I probably should have asked this before, but does your boyfriend, husband, whoever this Alex is, know that you’re here? Or did you just leave his flat without explanation?”

“I told him I needed to take a walk,” Danny answers. “It might not have been the best way, but if Alex had a problem, he probably wouldn’t tell me. And I accept this about him.”

Paul raises an eyebrow. “So, back to my question of, is he worth it-”

The question is heavy in the air.

Danny sighs. “I want to spend the rest of my life with him. Only, he’s a genius, an actual genius, and doesn’t believe in soulmates, and I know he isn’t happy with his job, but he’s the sort of calm that I usually don’t trust. I don’t think he lies so much as doesn’t tell me a lot of things.”

“Huh,” Paul says. Licking some salt off his fingers, he comments, “I can’t really imagine all that, sorry. Despite our rough start, once we finally started figuring things out, Kim and I’ve never had any secrets from each other. I can relate with the calm you can’t trust bit, though. She’s gotten better, but in school, Karl was very good at never letting anything show. Sometimes, it’d make me so frustrated, because, all I wanted was to make my mate happy and know he was okay. The few times I got to see genuine emotion, especially the good kind- Well, another boy or not, looking back, I don’t know how in the hell I didn’t recognise being in love for what it was back then. Kim tried her best to keep being like that when we first met, and it didn’t help either of us.”

Taking a sip of his tea, Danny asks, “Do you believe in soulmates?” 

“Oh, yeah,” Paul answers. “Always have. Kim, she’s sort of like your partner. Part logic, bringing up all sorts of maths, and part outright cynicism. But that’s okay, because, I know that she’d always choose me, just like I’d always choose her.”

“What if you aren’t soulmates, though?”

Paul shrugs. “The way I see it, I’ve gone over fifty years without the other part of my soul, then, and for as long as I’ve been around her, whether she was Kim or Karl, even through the rough times, I’ve been so happy that I don’t need to be complete. And if soulmates just don’t exist, then, still, out of everyone else in the world, I’d pick her.”

“And you know it’s the same for her?”

“Yes. I didn’t always, and that was another layer to all the other problems we faced. Eventually, I decided, if I can’t trust her when she says she loves and wants and needs me, I can’t really trust anyone, and so, I decided to trust her.”

Danny nods. “I’d love to trust Alex like that. I’ve always hated the phrase ‘too good for someone’. I know there are some bad people, and they don’t deserve anyone, because, all they’d do is hurt them, but otherwise, love should be about, well, love, not money or past mistakes or different education levels.”

“Shot in the dark, but Alex is a rich bloke who, in addition to being a genius, went to good schools?”

“He went to boarding school, and then, to university at fifteen. I’m an estate boy who has one year of uni under my belt. But he’s never cared about that. I’m just not sure-”

“About the stuff you do regret,” Paul gently supplies.

“Yeah.”

“Kim’s a writer who used to do greeting cards,” Paul says, “so, sorry if this comes out as cliché, but you aren’t your mistakes, you know.”

“Sometimes, though, you are,” Danny says. “I’m negative, but let’s just say that, for someone who grew up knowing all about HIV and the ways to be safe, I didn’t decide to take things seriously until a horrible wakeup call. I still don’t really recognise the person who did all that. Then, with Rich, the guy who Alex’s boss looks like- I’d rather not say what exactly that was all about. I’ve had some fun, and I’ve had some decent relationships. I wouldn’t want to erase all that just so I could be Alex’s first. But some of it, if I could erase it, I would in a heartbeat, because even then, it wasn’t who I wanted to be.”

“And are you now?”

Danny looks over in confusion.

“You said ‘even then’. So, are you still having fun with others and hanging out with people like this Rich bloke?”

“No,” he answers. “I’ve never cheated on Alex. I never would. And thankfully, I haven’t seen Rich in a little over a year. All that is still part of me, though.”

“Yeah, I suppose so,” Paul says. “Some of the things I did when I was trying to work out my feelings for Kim, they’re always going to be there, no matter how much I wish I could take them back. But then, who can say that they didn’t need to happen in order for us to get to this point?”

Danny shrugs. “I like to think, if something’s meant to happen, it will, even if there’s no proper chain of events.”

Paul grins. “I think I might think that, too.”

Suddenly, his expression becomes more serious. “Your call, mate, but if you ask me, you should get home or to Alex’s flat or wherever he is and talk to him. If you’re at the point where you want to spend the rest of your life with someone but don’t know if they want the same, sounds like a proper discussion is in order, right?”

“What if he doesn’t,” Danny quietly asks.

Giving him a sympathetic look, Paul responds with, “If that’s the case, you have to ask yourself: Would it hurt more now or later? You’d probably get some more happiness if you waited, but can you be sure that getting that extra happiness won’t just cause the later hurt to be that much worse?”

“Thank you,” Danny tells him.

“Thank you for the crisps,” Paul responds. Re-offering his hand, he adds, “Good luck, mate.”

Danny nods. “I hope your wife gets back soon. Take care.”

“You, too.”

…

After calling Alex, Danny goes back to his own flat.

Alex is waiting in bed with a book of Sudoku puzzles in front of him.

Slipping off his shoes, Danny asks, “How many have you already solved?”

“All of them,” Alex answers. He reaches out when Danny gets close to the bed and gently tugs. “Is something wrong, Danny?”

Sighing, he leans into Alex and lets the soft smell of Alex’s soap fill his nose. “Your boss looked like someone I once knew. Not a pleasant person.”

“Did this person hurt you?”

“I hurt myself,” Danny answers. Moving slightly, he lies down on the bed.

Alex stays sitting up but turns and threads his fingers through Danny’s hair.

“We haven’t really talked about it, but some of the people I used to be with- even back then, I knew better. They weren’t good people, and what we did together weren’t good things. Knowing better and, I’m not sure how to say this- caring? Truly understanding?- weren’t necessarily the same things back then for me.”

Alex is quiet.

“I really don’t want to hurt you, Alex, and I’m not trying to. It’s just- For all you know, I’m one of those mistakes some people have to make in order to get to a better point in their life. You said yourself, there might be someone better out there for you. Aren’t you supposed to test theoreticals?”

Setting the book aside, Alex lies down, buries his face in Danny’s neck, and wraps around him.

As always, a sense of peace and rightness makes way through Danny’s body and mind.

“My feelings for you aren’t theoretical. I don’t need to do tests to know how I feel.”

“There might be someone who could make you feel even better. Who you could love more or differently or better than what you have with me.”

“Do you know the exact number of men you’ve been with?”

The question is delivered without the usual judgement other people would have, but it still makes Danny wary.

“No.”

“How many would you expect me to be with, and what would you expect me to do with them, before you accepted my decision? I’d be just as much of a mistake to them as certain other people have been to you.”

“Alex,” he patiently says, “I’m saying that I might be a mistake you’re making.”

“No,” is Alex’s simple response.

“Alex-”

Alex moves even closer against him. “I’ve made mistakes. Most of them are different from the kind you’ve made, but regardless of what type it is, a mistake is a mistake. I know how to recognise one.”

“Sometimes, you don’t see that you’ve made a mistake until later after you’ve already made it,” Danny points out. “You don’t realise you’re making it while you are.”

“I’m beginning to understand how you feel,” Alex says. “I can’t definitively prove my point or disprove what you’re saying, but I still know I’m in the right. I love you, Danny. You might have been a mistake to certain other people, but you aren’t to me. I don’t want or need to be with other people to know I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

The words hit, he feels warmth flood through his body, and he turns to kiss Alex. “I love you, too. And I want to spend the rest of my life with you.”

A good chunk of the tension eases out of Alex’s body.

Danny continues to slowly and softly kiss him.

They both sigh when they break apart.

“Okay,” Danny says. “No more talk about other people, I promise.”

“Thank you,” is Alex’s soft reply.

“Want to get ready for bed?”

Against his neck, Alex nods.

…

Alex sleeps on his back, and Danny often wraps around him.

Doing so now, Danny asks, “Do you think you’ll be able to sleep?”

“Yes.”

“If you’re still up in an hour or two, wake me. I’ll go get the DVD player from Sara’s room.”

Alex nods and turns his head. “Thank you.”

“No problem.” Danny kisses him.

Soon, Alex’s breathing evens out, and Danny lets himself fall into sleep.


End file.
